There is a popular saying that claims while pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. There is no escaping the painful fact that we cannot control the people, places and things we interact with nor can we be assured that the outcomes we seek in interactions with others will be guaranteed. As reasonable as those expectations are, there will be times when, in spite of our best intentions, we become locked in emotional control battles such as difficult relationships, losses, mistreatments by others or by life, health problems, career frustrations or any other causes of suffering, leaving us feeling victimized and resentful.
Many of us already have a decent understanding of how and why we are “stuck.” What we do not know how to do is to let go of whatever it is that is hurting us. Enter Forgiveness Counseling. In 2002, Dr. Fred Luskin published Forgive For Good, which laid out the nine-step forgiveness process he created that has been extensively researched and successfully used to help tens of thousands suffering people.
Since 2008, I have been training with and teaching alongside Dr. Luskin, refining his Forgive for Good methodology for use in my clinical practice. Using the Forgive for Good practices, I will teach you how to:
- Create “positive refocusing” through exercises of mindfulness, the use of the narrative, and guided imagery;
- Identify and examine the major underpinnings of grievance formation;
- Recognize typical resistances to practicing forgiveness and learn methods for working through them; and
- Learn how to incorporate the practice of forgiveness into your everyday life.
I welcome any questions you may have, so please feel free to contact me.
“Dr Nick Ney is an associate of mine who has worked with me on presenting Forgive For Good workshops. He was trained in our year long forgiveness training program for therapists and has successfully led workshops on forgiveness locally and throughout the West. Dr Ney has my full confidence as a clinician and a trainer. He is a skilled therapist who has absorbed this powerful method for letting go of hurt, helplessness, and anger. I have seen his presentations help increase participant’s confidence, hope, and happiness in their daily affairs. If you find yourself battling with anger and resentment I recommend you contact Dr. Ney for help.”
– Fred Luskin, Ph.D. Author of Forgive For Good
“I had the opportunity of being supervised by Nick during my post-doc year and again as a psychological assistant. I really absorbed a lot from Nick because his presence invited collaboration and introspection. Nick’s deep insights about this human endeavor called psychotherapy will always stay with me. I think back on our weekly meetings and remember his warmth, fun attitude, and thoughtfulness. I could sense how he is as a therapist by his impact on me – I always felt respected and yet at the same time, challenged to grow.”
– Amy Greaves, Ph.D.
“I was fortunate to work for Dr. Nick Ney as a psychological assistant prior to being licensed as a clinical psychologist in private practice. Many of the attributes I so enjoyed in the mentorship I received from Nick speak to his excellence as a psychotherapist. Perhaps first and foremost, Dr. Ney is deeply compassionate and wise. Second, his presence is utterly welcoming and totally accepting. Lastly, from the depth and wealth of his experience, he always generously offered insightful, intelligent, and creative guidance and feedback regarding the healing work I was doing with my clients. I enthusiastically recommend Dr. Nick Ney, both as a psychotherapist, and as a mentor.”
– Sean Hatt, Ph.D.
“On the 10th anniversary of 9/11, our church’s youth group invited Dr. Ney to speak to our entire community about forgiveness. His message appealed to people of all faith backgrounds and was marvelously well-received. Even our busy teens took the time to attend, and they asked some challenging questions! He gave us very practical advice to face our issues and learn how to come to peace. Dr. Ney’s humble, caring manner helped us all contemplate forgiveness in a new light. ”
– Colleen Vandevoorde, Youth MInister at St. Cyprian Church in Sunnyvale